Women in history post: Saint Olga of Kyiv
Olga was the queen of the Kyivan Rus, a Viking-ruled territory during the 9th and 10th centuries that covered parts of modern-day Ukraine, Belarus and Russia. When her husband went out to the Drevlian tribe to collect tributes, he was captured, tortured and killed. The Drevlians then went to Olga saying that she now has to marry one of their leaders and basically give up her throne.
Olga told the messengers that, being now a helpless woman, she will comply and agree to marry. She told them to go back to their boat and her attendants will come get them in the morning. They were supposed to carry the Drevlians in their boat and parade them in the main streets with honour. They did that the next morning, but instead of going to the palace, the boat and the messengers were thrown into a ditch and were buried alive.
With the news not yet having reached the Drevlians, Olga sends her own messengers and asks that they bring their "best men". When they arrive, Olga lures them to a bath house saying they have to bathe before appearing before her. Once they were all inside, she locks them in and orders that the building be burned down with the men still inside.
She then sends another message to the Drevlians saying she was coming to their city to marry. But first, she asked that plenty of food and mead be prepared near where her husband was buried so that she can weep over his tomb have a proper funeral feast. She arrived and invited members of the Drevlian leadership to the feast as guests. When everyone was drunk, her retinue came out and she ordered that everyone at the feast be killed.
With her army now in full force, she laid siege to the Drevlians' city. When asked for terms, Olga said that all she wanted was all the messenger pigeons and sparrows in the city. When they gave it to her, she attached a small piece of cloth and sulphur to each bird. She set those on fire and released the birds, who went back to their nests in the city. This caused multiple massive fires that burned the city to the ground.
The Drevlians finally gave up, paid her tribute, and Olga completed her revenge.
A few years later, she visited Constantinople and converted to Christianity. While she wasn't able to do it in her lifetime, her grandson eventually made Christianity the state religion of the Kyivan Rus. She was eventually canonized as Saint Olga and was given the epithet "Equal to the Apostles".
Obviously that's ridiculous. The apostles would never have been able to pull off anything that badass.
In any case whenever I say wife is a saint, I say it not just to compliment her kindness and her selfless nature. I'm also wishing (and warning people) that she will do the same for me.
